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Cowboys @ Vikings: Jared Allen Inadvertently Guarantees Cowboys Victory

This playoff game between the Dallas Cowboys and the Minnesota Vikings can't get here soon enough. At least once the game is played, the guarantees and the counter-guarantees can all come to an end. Plenty of Vikings players are feeling feisty, and probably have a lot of pent-up energy after sitting out last week with a bye. They need to play some football, and I couldn't agree more.

One team will win, one will lose, and all the silliness will stop.

What silliness?

Star-divide

It started with Pat Williams, the Vikings mammoth defensive tackle. He ‘guaranteed' a Minny victory

Williams was asked on Monday, "Joe Namath waited until the Super Bowl to guarantee a win. You want to guarantee a Super Bowl win today?"

"No, I ain't (giving a) guarantee (for the Super Bowl). We just have to win this first game. I guarantee we win this first game, though," he said.. "Yeah, we're going to win this first game."

But, since he's a defensive tackle, not many paid attention. Nobody listens to the interior linemen!

In an effort to upgrade their ‘guarantee' predictions, ol' Gray Beard stepped in and upped the ante - sort of. 

"Honestly, I see us sitting here next week having this press conference again," Favre said, via the Minneapolis Star Tribune. "If that doesn't happen, to me it will be a shock."

Of course, Favre was referring to a press conference next week in the same vein as the one he was giving - talking about the upcoming playoff game. Translation: It'd be a shock if they didn't win Sunday. As far as guarantees go, that one is about as week as they come.

But it didn't stop our own Gerald Sensabaugh from responding

``We'd have to beat ourselves to lose,'' Sensabaugh said. ``The way we're playing right now, I don't think we can be beat.''

``He might can do a news conference, but he might be on the losing end."

Well, not exactly a stinging rebuke.

Sigh, all this guarantee talk is riding way below the acceptable level - I mean, if you're going to guarantee a win, do it Joe Namath-style. Just come out and say it.

Wait, we have a development. Jared Allen has made a statement. 

When the radio host asked him for a prediction to Sunday's game, Allen said, "We kick butt."

Uh oh, big mistake. Remember last week, when a Dallas opponent tweeted

"Its all good we gonna sting they ass next week lil buddy ..."

We know how that turned out. Apparently, the Cowboys don't like anybody, talking anything, about making physical contact with their posteriors. Leave the gluteus maximus alone when discussing Dallas.

Too late. Jared Allen just inadvertently guaranteed a Cowboys victory when he declared "we kick butt."

This game can't get here soon enough. Or else I'll be forced to look for more ‘guarantees'. Please don't make me do that!

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I wanna be first one time

and till that day I will keep watching and hopefully that dream becomes a reality . ……Yes I will gloat because I will be on top :)

"When people talk about Super Bowl dynasties they mention the 1970's Steelers, 1980's 49ers, 1990's Cowboys and the current New England Patriots, but nobody has dominated the Super Bowl like Anheuser-Busch. In recent years, Budweiser has been the MVP of Super Bowl advertising -- making another company the favorite to win the Ad Meter poll was never an option."

Simon Noble

by dubious on Jan 15, 2010 2:51 PM CST up reply actions  

Man oh man...

I have always dug Brett Favre, but I honestly hope Dallas sends him into another teary retirement.

by The Immortal Iron Fist AKA AFB on Jan 15, 2010 10:57 AM CST reply actions  

I cant agree more..

in regards to Farve. I must admit I have been one of his supporters since he got traded to GB. I just hope he has a few alzhemeir moments this weekend

by FireSpark on Jan 15, 2010 11:01 AM CST up reply actions  

GB set Favre up to fail...

Now I hope the Cowboys defense sets him up for failure. Fingers crossed!!!!

by jdramirez on Jan 15, 2010 12:40 PM CST up reply actions  

Or at least to an offseason

of BSPN camped out outside his his house.

by Impatient on Jan 15, 2010 11:31 AM CST up reply actions  

it would just be all too perfect wouldn't it?

we’ve been the team thats plagued him over his whole career

by foyesboys on Jan 15, 2010 6:50 PM CST up reply actions  

Ole Gray Beard.....

…..I almost spit coffee onto my computer when I read that. Well done.

by allhailcale on Jan 15, 2010 10:58 AM CST reply actions  

Almost, I have to clean it off right after I type this.

Texas: Where God goes to relax.
Unless he's watching the Cowboys.

by GunsUp on Jan 15, 2010 10:59 AM CST up reply actions  

Apparenlty you are failing to grasp that no Vikings actually HAVe made "guarantees"

(Except for Pat — and if you read the article by the reporter he was talking to, you’d know he was laughing when he said it). That Jared made a guarantee is just something that Dave Harpin made up. Let me say something “controversial”: there will be players on BOTH sides kicking butt. Including the losing side.

As for Favre, who apparently set this off, here are his actual words — in a response to a question about whether he’s thinking about his plans for next year, by the way, not a question that even has the words ’Cowboys" in it:

Honestly, I see us sitting here next week having this press conference again. If that doesn’t happen, to me it will be a shock.

Here is the definition of shocked from dictionary.com:

a sudden or violent disturbance of the mind, emotions, or sensibilities: The burglary was a shock to her sense of security.

A “shock” is not “something I don’t expect to happen.” The opposite: A shock is something that can happen, and would upset you if it did happen.

But, for those “verbally challenged” like Sensabaugh whose vocabulary may be limited, Favre clarified this for you today:

Brett Favre didn’t learn he had supposedly guaranteed a Vikings playoff victory Sunday over Dallas by turning on the television, scanning the Internet or even reading a good old-fashioned newspaper. Rather, the quarterback found out about his “guarantee” when he received a few calls from his home in Mississippi.

He wasn’t amused. “First of all I’m not guaranteeing anything, and the last thing I ever want to do is be bulletin-board material,” Favre said Thursday. “Of course, I gave the Cowboys a ton of respect. They deserve it. They are playing outstanding. They are playing — and I’m speaking NFC — as well if not the best maybe in the league. San Diego, obviously, would argue that. How could I sit there and say, ‘Well, next week possibly [we] could be home?’ That very well could be true, could be over, for both teams. I’m sure people want to take it [as] he’s guaranteeing a victory.”

Welcome to the lightning-rod world of Favre, where sometimes statements that are meant to be innocuous can garner headlines. On Wednesday, Favre said: “Honestly, I see us sitting here next week having this press conference again. If that doesn’t happen, to me it will be a shock.”

On Thursday, Favre said all he was trying to do was make it clear he has confidence in himself and his teammates. He admitted that is something he probably should have done more of during the course of his 19-year career. Favre, 40, also did not hide the fact it irritates him to end up having his comments come under a microscope.

“I guess nothing surprises me, but you’re damned if you do, damned if you don’t,” he said. “If you don’t say enough, you say too much.

by puddnhead on Jan 15, 2010 1:44 PM CST up reply actions  

It doesn't matter in the end pud.

People will believe what they believe.

Texas: Where God goes to relax.
Unless he's watching the Cowboys.

by GunsUp on Jan 15, 2010 2:09 PM CST up reply actions  

whatever pudd

Just stfu and take this ass-kicking.

by MicThaRock on Jan 15, 2010 11:05 PM CST via mobile up reply actions  

I can live with the gurantees as long as dallas keeps winning, so let the BS flow; I do agree that all the talk just makes

the wait for the game that much more unbearable. The NFL has found its WWE side to help build the hype and frenzy over the playoffs that the BCS could only dream about.

Ignore the Mainstream Media, EMBRACE THE HATE!!!!

by cowboy78 on Jan 15, 2010 11:03 AM CST reply actions  

It's

going to be a damn good game.

58-14 Beats 44-6!!

by Dub_TC on Jan 15, 2010 11:13 AM CST reply actions  

Berkeley.

You’re the Best! Around! Nothing’s gonna ever keep you down...
You’re the Best! Around! Nothing’s gonna ever keep you dow-ow-ow-own!

by Aaron Novinger on Jan 15, 2010 11:16 AM CST up reply actions  

however

methinks DeSean’s research papers would read like Twitters

by Joey2zs on Jan 15, 2010 11:35 AM CST up reply actions  

Yeah, but he does

contribute to the thought that all college atheletes are there to play and not learn.

Texas: Where God goes to relax.
Unless he's watching the Cowboys.

by GunsUp on Jan 15, 2010 11:36 AM CST up reply actions  

I'm just saying...

How I write on sports blogs, text my friends, speak to various people, and prepare reports for my clients are all vastly different. My step brother is working on his PhD in linguistics, but his texts are sometimes indecipherable for me.

by Baked Potato Soup on Jan 15, 2010 11:40 AM CST up reply actions  

Do you think he sends those kinds of texts to his proffessor?

Will he send those types of texts to his future employer/supervisor? Perception preempts reality. He may be the smartest kid in the world, but he will have to go a long way towards proving that now.

Texas: Where God goes to relax.
Unless he's watching the Cowboys.

by GunsUp on Jan 15, 2010 11:44 AM CST up reply actions  

That's exactly my point, though.

How my bro texts me is completely different than how he speaks to me, which is probably different than how he speaks to his students, which is also probably different than how he speaks to his own professors. I don’t take how someone posts on Twitter as a sign of their writing ability. Most of those posts are mobile anyway and are done not only for effect (azz vs. ass), but for conservation of button pushes.

I’m not saying the guy’s a genius, but I’m betting he uses a different tone and at least a spell check when he wrote papers. Either way, he makes more per year than I do in a decade probably.

by Baked Potato Soup on Jan 15, 2010 11:49 AM CST up reply actions  

I'm going to assume that his "tutor" used spell check.

Texas: Where God goes to relax.
Unless he's watching the Cowboys.

by GunsUp on Jan 15, 2010 11:52 AM CST up reply actions  

Liguistics?

His PhD paper would be indecipherable for me!

by Dave Chappelle Jr. AKA Felix Jones on Jan 15, 2010 3:57 PM CST up reply actions  

Disagree

I can tell you are intelligent by reading your informal blog comments.

by Dave Chappelle Jr. AKA Felix Jones on Jan 15, 2010 4:01 PM CST up reply actions  

yeah, conversation when being judged is less likely

is what really reveals your intelligence, or at least your desire to not look like an idiot

by kevinkinsler on Jan 15, 2010 4:22 PM CST up reply actions  

interesting

DeSean Jackson is to the English language what Mike Fisher is to sports journalism.

They both demean it by pretending they have a handle on it and can use it to impart something to inform us.

by Joey2zs on Jan 15, 2010 11:54 PM CST up reply actions  

He didn't finish college, did he?

I had a bunch of friends who were dumb as sticks and they got into college.

by jdramirez on Jan 15, 2010 12:41 PM CST up reply actions  

DMN had a good post about WP future, a lot of us here feel that WP has done enough to secure his job for next year

but JJ has not come out and officially stated it. The hiring of pasqueloni to replace todd after WP suggested it says that JJ is going to keep WP; otherwise why move so quickly to fill a position so soon if todd is going to stay on until their season ends?

http://cowboysblog.dallasnews.com/archives/2010/01/wade-phillips-one-step-closer-to-coming.html

Ignore the Mainstream Media, EMBRACE THE HATE!!!!

by cowboy78 on Jan 15, 2010 11:16 AM CST reply actions  

As a side note,

aren’t the DMN’s blog ads loud as hell? Whenever I check it, some lady starts screaming labor pains. Makes me not want to go there as much.

You’re the Best! Around! Nothing’s gonna ever keep you down...
You’re the Best! Around! Nothing’s gonna ever keep you dow-ow-ow-own!

by Aaron Novinger on Jan 15, 2010 11:17 AM CST up reply actions  

If I have one more add for women's apparel I'll....click the close ad button.

Seriously Sensabaugh…you better back that up with your best game as a Cowboy!

The tribulations of Winter...
90% of Americans say 'OH SHIT!' before going into the ditch on a slippery road.
The other 10% are from TEXAS and they say, 'HOLD MY BEER AND WATCH THIS!!!'

by White Wolf on Jan 15, 2010 11:21 AM CST up reply actions  

Hold onto a pick and he'll do fine.

"I hope they become a 'Doomsday'. I hope they consider this bunch better than any of the other ones. I want them to do well. I want people to say they're better than the group I played with. That would make me very happy." -Randy White

by Big D Bam Bam on Jan 17, 2010 6:57 AM CST up reply actions  

They have fixed that now, they had a post that stated that those ads now have volume control to where you can mute them

so that has been a big help; it was getting on everyone’s nerves so they finally did something.

Ignore the Mainstream Media, EMBRACE THE HATE!!!!

by cowboy78 on Jan 15, 2010 11:22 AM CST up reply actions  

I think Jerry is using it as a motivational tool at this point.

I think we all know that Wade is coming back, but some guys just do better, when the pressure is on. Maybe Jerry thinks that the team and Wade are both doing better because they are fighting for Wade’s job.

by Baked Potato Soup on Jan 15, 2010 11:36 AM CST up reply actions  

Plus...

why should Jerry say anything right now?

by The Immortal Iron Fist AKA AFB on Jan 15, 2010 11:46 AM CST up reply actions  

I saw somewhere that Jerry said.........

that he’s superstitious. He said that the Cowboys went on a roll after he came out and said that the Cowboys had to win and he would have to re-evaluate after the season is over. Not before then. Makes sense that he doesn’t want to disrupt anything if indeed he’s telling the truth about being superstitous.

by texstar on Jan 15, 2010 12:30 PM CST up reply actions  

I think I read that in the DMN

and anyways didn’t JJ already say he would make an announcement in these regards the day after the ‘Boys last game? Sounds like he’s already made his mind up to me

by strobman on Jan 15, 2010 11:45 PM CST up reply actions  

The reason to hire Pasqualoni now is he would not be unemployed for long.

Todd Ganther leaving is a significant loss for Dallas. He was a major upgrade over the previous defensive line coach and the teams young lineman have played better this season.

That said, I have a lot of respect for Paul Pasqualoni. He is a top notch coach who was a head coach for 14 years and a defensive coordinator for 3. He is a passionate guy who knows football and Dallas is fortunate to get him on staff at the position coach level.

He has a reputation for helping players focus on the details of the game. Both Witten and Ware have given him credit for helping them improve their craft when he was their position coach. As a college head coach he help develop Dwight Freeney, Marvin Harrison and Donovan McNabb among others.

I am glad to see Dallas grab him before he got job offers from another team. A little bonus for the Cowboys is that as Miami’s Defensive Coordinator this season he coached against the four AFC opponents that they will face in 2010.

by Trey, on Jan 15, 2010 12:11 PM CST up reply actions  

The first year AD that fired him despite the University Presidents wishes got what was coming to him.

After 14 years of .750 football and yearly bowl games the Orangeman have been a .250 team in the five years since he ended his tenure.

by Trey, on Jan 15, 2010 12:12 PM CST up reply actions  

We do. The Dolphins also played them this season.

"I hope they become a 'Doomsday'. I hope they consider this bunch better than any of the other ones. I want them to do well. I want people to say they're better than the group I played with. That would make me very happy." -Randy White

by Big D Bam Bam on Jan 15, 2010 3:44 PM CST up reply actions  

Favre is comfortable in Wrangler, but I can’t wait to see how comfortable he is in a Ware-Spencer sandwich. Sunday can’t get here soon enough.

Happily supporting non-championship teams and self-medicating since 1996.

by chantshuffler on Jan 15, 2010 11:32 AM CST via mobile reply actions   1 recs

Nate Jones was the one to knock him out

I think Wade will send corner blitzes a few times this game

"We play to win the game" - Herm Edwards

by nicholas.rodriguez on Jan 15, 2010 11:46 AM CST up reply actions  

Probably a good idea.

We’ll probably see at least one DB blitz, especially if they are paying too much attention to either Spencer or Ware. They’ll likely double Ware and have the back eye Spencer, so sending a corner in from Ware’s side would be tough for them to block. Or if the back is keying on Ware also, sending a corner with Spencer creates an immediate mismatch somewhere. They’ve gotta be careful, though, because if Favre can do anything, it’s rifle a slant, and all of his receivers are game breakers.

by Baked Potato Soup on Jan 15, 2010 11:53 AM CST up reply actions  

Different team, different Favre, different Cowboys.

The guy is playing as well as I have seen him play in a long, long time, and the Vikings have a ton of talent at almost every position. Other than the Cowboys, they are probably the most complete team in the NFC. I think this is going to be a tough, tough game.

by Baked Potato Soup on Jan 15, 2010 11:46 AM CST up reply actions  

I agree.

Fortunatly I think Dallas matches up really well with them.

It should be a good game, although I said that about the Eagles last game too.

I hope that I can be drunk and happy by half time.

by The Immortal Iron Fist AKA AFB on Jan 15, 2010 11:48 AM CST up reply actions  

Aikman said that he thought whoever wins this game.........

will be the NFC Champion heading into the Super Bowl. These two teams are the most balanced as far as Offense/Defense.

by texstar on Jan 15, 2010 12:34 PM CST up reply actions  

Collinsworth

said that if Dallas wins, he’s picking them to WIN the SB.

by The Immortal Iron Fist AKA AFB on Jan 15, 2010 1:28 PM CST up reply actions  

I think thats ridiculous

I’d take New Orleans over Minnesota in a heartbeat. And Arizona crushed them a month ago.

We match up well with Minny. I don’t think a NO/Arizona game would be as good for us. I like both of those teams pass blocking more than Minny’s.

by foyesboys on Jan 15, 2010 6:54 PM CST up reply actions  

He was playing pretty good last time we faced him too.

Texas: Where God goes to relax.
Unless he's watching the Cowboys.

by GunsUp on Jan 15, 2010 11:49 AM CST up reply actions  

Your probably right...

but I play Super Tecmo Bowl earlier today and with Aikman playing the role of Romo, Novacek as Witten and Emmitt as MarTashJones, we won the game 42 to 7. Granted Wade Wilson was playing the role of Favre and Herchel Walker as Peterson… but that’s neither here nor there.

by jdramirez on Jan 15, 2010 12:48 PM CST up reply actions  

We don't have the dynamic Nate Jones on the team...

Nate was the straw the stirred the drink. Why oh why did we ever let Nate leave.

by jdramirez on Jan 15, 2010 12:45 PM CST up reply actions  

What a relief for everyone when this game

finally gets here and all this will be done and useless lol

Should be a good game and I can’t wait. Counting down the days like a kid waiting on Christmas, and here’s hoping Santa Wade gives me a chance to do my victory dance Sunday :)

"When people talk about Super Bowl dynasties they mention the 1970's Steelers, 1980's 49ers, 1990's Cowboys and the current New England Patriots, but nobody has dominated the Super Bowl like Anheuser-Busch. In recent years, Budweiser has been the MVP of Super Bowl advertising -- making another company the favorite to win the Ad Meter poll was never an option."

Simon Noble

by dubious on Jan 15, 2010 12:05 PM CST reply actions  

My Cowboy Christmas Tree at work is still up.

Texas: Where God goes to relax.
Unless he's watching the Cowboys.

by GunsUp on Jan 15, 2010 12:07 PM CST up reply actions  

Hopefully we'll be talking about a NFC Championship match against Arizona then :)

2009 Dallas Cowboys: 11-5!!!
2009 New York Jets: not 11-5 :(, but PLAYOFFS!!!
2009-2010 Dallas Mavericks: 57-25, despite the recent molestation at the hands of the Lakers

by Grady90 on Jan 15, 2010 12:23 PM CST up reply actions  

It was in my house.

My wife said it clashed with the furniture. Next year we will have blue and silver furniture.

Texas: Where God goes to relax.
Unless he's watching the Cowboys.

by GunsUp on Jan 15, 2010 1:39 PM CST up reply actions  

+1

"When people talk about Super Bowl dynasties they mention the 1970's Steelers, 1980's 49ers, 1990's Cowboys and the current New England Patriots, but nobody has dominated the Super Bowl like Anheuser-Busch. In recent years, Budweiser has been the MVP of Super Bowl advertising -- making another company the favorite to win the Ad Meter poll was never an option."

Simon Noble

by dubious on Jan 15, 2010 2:53 PM CST up reply actions  

I'm looking forward to losing my voice because I'm joyful...

Not because I’m cursing up a storm because we play like crap. I really flipped out when the Giants returned that kick for a TD. That just hurt.

by jdramirez on Jan 15, 2010 12:49 PM CST up reply actions  

FYI

Favre was referring to a question regarding his eventual retirement. See his comment on Thursday to assuage the ’’gaurantee" ruffled feathers.

by Jepp The Viking on Jan 15, 2010 12:09 PM CST reply actions  

My feathers aren't ruffled.

Now if he had gone out and spit on the star in the Death Star, that would be a different story. Do you think he has time to fly to Arlington before Sunday?

Texas: Where God goes to relax.
Unless he's watching the Cowboys.

by GunsUp on Jan 15, 2010 12:11 PM CST up reply actions  

I'M SO EXCITED!

Too bad I’ll only be able to watch the second half or fourth quarter of it, though as I’m leaving to go back to the States and will need to spend time with the family…even though I’ve been here three weeks.

GO COWBOYS

2009 Dallas Cowboys: 11-5!!!
2009 New York Jets: not 11-5 :(, but PLAYOFFS!!!
2009-2010 Dallas Mavericks: 57-25, despite the recent molestation at the hands of the Lakers

by Grady90 on Jan 15, 2010 12:21 PM CST reply actions  

boys will be boys

i’m reading that book right now and i honestly get the same vibe from this dallas team that is talked about in the book before the superbowl. these guys have each other’s back. and they are confident. dallas will win and favre will retire right after. death rattle says so.

it's called a satchel and indiana jones wears one.

by maxdout on Jan 15, 2010 12:51 PM CST reply actions  

well, if death rattle says so...

then my confidence just went way the eff up. I want 5+ sacks, please. Thanks.

I have noticed a new resurgence in Cowboy hating in 2007, which can only mean one thing- We're back.

by nspirals on Jan 15, 2010 12:57 PM CST up reply actions  

testing testing

just wanna see how my pic turned out.

by ziggy19 on Jan 15, 2010 1:06 PM CST reply actions  

can barely see it

so it turned out great :)

j/k man :)

"When people talk about Super Bowl dynasties they mention the 1970's Steelers, 1980's 49ers, 1990's Cowboys and the current New England Patriots, but nobody has dominated the Super Bowl like Anheuser-Busch. In recent years, Budweiser has been the MVP of Super Bowl advertising -- making another company the favorite to win the Ad Meter poll was never an option."

Simon Noble

by dubious on Jan 15, 2010 2:54 PM CST up reply actions  

Ughh I'm so mad right now

There’s a minor league football team that I’m trying out for, but the tryouts are at the same time as the game, from 1 to 4, so I cant see it. Tell me all the details will ya.

by kwentin on Jan 15, 2010 1:27 PM CST reply actions  

yea that would be a nice gesture to do

and I enjoy reading it

"When people talk about Super Bowl dynasties they mention the 1970's Steelers, 1980's 49ers, 1990's Cowboys and the current New England Patriots, but nobody has dominated the Super Bowl like Anheuser-Busch. In recent years, Budweiser has been the MVP of Super Bowl advertising -- making another company the favorite to win the Ad Meter poll was never an option."

Simon Noble

by dubious on Jan 15, 2010 3:10 PM CST up reply actions  

I hope not...

Those guys are goobs.

Put that in wide print.

by The Immortal Iron Fist AKA AFB on Jan 15, 2010 5:51 PM CST up reply actions  

that was ugly

I want the 30 seconds of my life back this post stole from me …

by Elberraco on Jan 15, 2010 3:41 PM CST via mobile reply actions  

90th

Sorry, had to.

Jimmy Johnson for GM.

by TXHC on Jan 15, 2010 6:55 PM CST reply actions  

guarantees are adolescent

i’m all for guys being confident, but i just think these guarantees are dumb. they don’t determine anything, and if they end up being wrong, there’s very little cost to the boaster.

now, if one of these guys said, “i guarantee we’ll win, and if we don’t, i’ll retire,” that would catch my ear. otherwise, these guys are just a bunch of hot air.

by g8tgod on Jan 16, 2010 8:19 PM CST reply actions  

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