BTB Shame Report: Week 4

And now, it is time for the shame report for this week.  Now, this probably won't live up to the week 3 shame report, just for the sheer fact of bulletin board material that was there.  Also, quite frankly, this team has a lot to be ashamed for this past week, but I must be fair.  I won't spend as much time on this week's either just because thinking about the game still makes me sick to my stomach.  So let's get on with it.

#5 - Matthew Stafford

Ok, we know you ended up playing a pretty good game.  But we are going to stem this back to the past few weeks.  People have started calling the lions the Cardiac Cats, and rightfully so.  But, could you stand to play well for the entire game?  It seems that you play really well for half the game and stink it up for the rest of it.  You just have been doing that for the right half of the game, the second half.  So that is a little shameful there.  The other part, YOU ARE A DALLAS NATIVE!!  How dare you come back home and piss on our turf?  That's like coming home for thanksgiving and pissing in your dad's favorite chair before the football games come on.  We understand it is your job to win though, so we can't blame you for that, which is why you are at #5 and not higher.  Although this helps some too with that:


Apparently you are sticking to the Cowboy way in some regards, but please, stop stealing our future cheerleaders.  And until you start being a real quarterback and do a little more than toss rainbows to a 6' 5" athletic freak (CJ) I'm gonna have to label you with this... SHAME!!!


#4 - Bobby Carpenter

We had Stephen Bowen last week, and that is pretty tough to top in lowliness and shame.  But you come PRETTY CLOSE to taking the cake there buddy.  And it is WEDDING CAKE for that matter.  For goodness sakes man, you were a GROOMSMAN at Tony Romo's wedding back in May.  And your first start, you are playing against him and you pick him off and return it for a touchdown.  Now we know it is your job as a player to do things like that, but you were a first round pick, and never in your career as a Cowboy did we see anything anywhere close to resembling that kind of playmaking ability.  Two weeks in a row we are shafted by a former player, but this one ended up getting the better of us.  And one more thing Bobby, we already got Clay Matthews doing the long hair thing.  Except that dude is a pro bowler, so he can kind of do whatever he wants.  However my dude, you haven't shown things like that yet, so get a haircut Fabio.


Big label of SHAME for you!!!

#3 - Jason Hansen

Well, you were named the special teams player of the week supposedly after your game against the Vikings and have been doing pretty well so far being perfect on all of your field goals coming into dallas going 8-8 on field goals and 11-11 on PATs.  However, how do you explain falling down on a kickoff!?


Really? That's all you have to say for yourself.  If not for the flubs of the Cowboys in the second half, this would have been the game clincher right there.  Not only that but Sean Lissemore returned the kick and made your special teams unit look absolutely foolish doing so.  Yes, a 300+ lbs man did that to you, returning it what I think was a good 40 yards or so.  SHAME ON YOU!!!

#2 - Ndamukong Suh

I mean, I don't even need to say anything about this.  We already had Bobby Carpenter come in and piss all over our house, then you come in and start trashin the place!?  I'm pretty sure you must have seen this coming down to Dallas and probably somewhere inside the "DEATH STAR" itself:


Roger Goodell, I think some disciplinary action may be in order.  SHAME ON YOU SUH!!!!


#1 - Jason Garrett/Tony Romo

It pains me to do this but the #1 this week has to go to the Cowboys, but it isn't just any one persons faullt.  Jason, I know that you would like to have a Tom Brady or Peyton Manning-esque QB.  But in reality, you don't.  I know Tony is great and is definitely a top 10 QB in this league, yes even after this last week.  But you have a much better run game than New England OR Indianapolis.  So how about you use it.  Do you really need to beat a team by more than 24 points?  The game is never done until the doors are closed.  So what is the door in the game?  The clock.  Until that clock strikes 0:00, the doors are not closed, so simply put, lets just close the doors, and you don't do that by passing the ball.  The defense was dominating that game, and I hope you noticed that 14 of those 31 points that they scored to get back in it, our defense wasn't even on the field to stop.  And Tony, we had all thought you had learned from your mistakes.  How dare you continue us on this Roller Coaster that we thought may have finally been done.  It is ok to Take a Sack and punt the ball or throw it away.  Now, two of those picks were either a good decision with a bad throw or a good decision and good throw with a bad route by the receiver (Laurent Robinson, you gotta cross the face of the DB harder than that so he can't jump the throw and fight for the ball EVERY play, no exceptions).  Once again the blame is falling on you, but I think we have to give some blame to Jason Garrett too.  Garrett, we love the way you have practiced situations and things, but maybe it is about time you do some door closing drills and just work on running down the clock.  That stuff is cute when we are playing from behind or in those situations, but this team, so far, when playing with huge leads have given those leads up because they haven't been able to CLOSE THE DOOR (Jets AND Lions).  So lets get this running game going and make sure we are just trying to run out the clock.  It is ok to start doing that in the third quarter.  When you have a lead, there is nothing better than a drive that takes 10 minutes off the clock AND scores (field goal or whatever).  So lets do some MILKING drills so we can Milk that clock in the future.


Well there are other parts of Shame for this past week that I can think of but these were my top five.  For one, Gerald Sensabaugh.  Great job on the pick man, but could you please at least make an attempt to get up and get some more out of it.  I don't think you're going to slide into the end zone untouched from 40 yards out.  Also Dez, great job on the two TD's.  We almost had to start calling YOU "Megatron" out there, because CJ wasn't doing anything so far.  But next time you catch a ball and start taunting the coach, make sure you didn't double clutch the catch and were in bounds.  Coaches shouldn't be talking smack to players, but he kind of had a right to there.  Also a little shameful for the Dallas defense to be dominating the league in sacks and not be able to get a sack on a team that was sacked 5 times last week.  C'mon now!!!

I can't wait for the pats game.  Now that we got the negative out of the way though lets get off to the positive.  There will be no Shame Report Week 5 most likely as it is the Bye, but I may change my mind based on what I see around the league.  Stay on the lookout for Keeping up with the Collegiates though.  There have been some interesting developments in the college ranks and a couple new players to keep an eye on.  GO COWBOYS!!!

Another user-created commentary provided by a BTB reader.

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