Rob Ryan vs. Anna Nicole Smith

When we first signed Robby R. my immediate reaction was one of elation.  The thought of bringing his exotic blitzes, and clever coverages over to Big D seemed like a match made in heaven.  But I fear that Rob Ryan may have more in common with Anna Nicole Smith (beyond their bra size and penchant for consuming enormous amounts of alcohol), than he does a savior to this team.

More after the Jump


Jerry Jones and Rob Ryan



The Infamous Anna Nicole Smith met the incredibly wealthy (old and sickly) J. Howard Marshall while getting naked for money "dancing" at Club Gigi’s, a Houston strip club.  When she married him he was nearly dead the ripe old age of 89.  This marriage took place after she divorced her then husband pretty much over-night (he was a line cook at a sleazy houston diner).  Marshall "The Billionare" who really had an affection for Smith, hoped that Smith was truly there for HIM.  However Anna Nicole Smith never even changed her name to Marshall, but kept it as SMITH.  Because Anna Nicole Smith was in it for Anna Nicole Smith.  As much as he loved her, there had to be a nagging part of him that wondered, "Is she here for us, or for her?"  And this sick, ridiculously rich man died a year later, and Anna Nicole Smith made her way onto television, movies and even became an "author" before she died not to long after.  It seemed like she was more into posturing for more opportunites in life than she was for them. "The Billionare's" family naturally had a problem with their father being used, but there was little they could do as that 90 year old man had already given her everything she wanted and needed. 

Let's fast forward to 2011.  Robby R. has been "dancing" at Club Cleveland Browns Stadium for a little while.  When the Dallas Cowboys (Billion dollar Organization) take notice of him and begin to flirt a little bit.  Robby R. sees his chance to get out of the slums filled with "Raiders" and ummm... "Browns???" and jumps at the opportunity when the Dallas Cowboys "propose".  The Dallas Cowboys think that Robby R. is doing this because he truly wants to be there for them.  However Robby R. never even changed his name to "Dallas Cowboys", but instead kept it as "Ryan".  Now while we have a very intelligent head coach who goes about his business as usual, we also have a loud mouthed (And I swear I like him by the way) headline grabbing coach who, in my very humble opinion appears to be actually TRYING to grab attention.  When I watch the Jets game and it's all about Rex Vs. Rob (which is normal) then watch the Niners game and have to watch the camera pretty much following around Rob Ryan, as he runs onto the field to scream at refs or whatever, there is a nagging part of me that wonders "Is he here for us, or for him?"  

"Yes" it's funny that he had the half naked girl on the BACK of his playsheet, but that just shows you how aware he is of the cameras, and how much he's willing to do to get attention. "Yes" I loved the fact that he was challenging the "Dream Team", but at the same time that's not HIS place, the head coach gets to decide whether or not to make those statements. Not an assistant. Just like it wasn't Vince Youngs place to call them the "Dream Team" in the first place, he's the BACK UP QUARTERBACK!  lol what a loser... lol

Now I don't expect him to not care about his career, but I tend to get the feeling sometimes that he's posturing for a Head Coaching position, more than buying into "us".  I believe that he is very good for our team, and I think that we defensively needed an immediate upgrade, which he and his scheme is.  Also the attitude he brings to the defense is very effective.  But Rex Ryan who appears to be much like Rob personality wise, was not all over the news until he was a head coach. He played his role first as an assistant.  I want Rob to be a good soldier for now and JUST play his role. All that he's done to get attention, I loved, but through this "lense" sometimes bothers me, it sometimes feels like he's playing a character so he can get more noteriety.  Now I can readily admit that my feelings on this issue may be directly related to my fear that we may lose him after one season and have to start over with a new DC, and a new scheme for the third year in a row.  But that notwithstanding, as a defensive coach we don't really need the amount of quotes we get from Robby R.  Is it the National Media's infatuation with everythin Ryan at the moment? Maybe.  Is it the fact that he's a new coach on the Dallas Cowboys?  Possibly.  Am I a paranoid individual not able to trust even my closest friends without being somewhat suspicious that they may be trying to get one over on me? Certainly.  But what has two thumbs, and has never been burned??? THIS GUY!!!


I leave you with two HILARIOUS, yet point-proving quotes from Rob Ryan.  The first is when he was asked in cleveland if he was worried about losing his job:

"I’m sure there are other people nervous but I’m not a guy that’s nervous, not anymore.  When I first got in the league I’d be scared $#!&less but not now.  Now it’s like please, there is nobody better.  I don’t care."


And my favorite:

"I know somebody said I’m not a good game day coach.  What a dumb $#*!. Anyway, I’m a great game day coach. Probably the best coach.  Been coaching a long time.  That’s okay.  It was somebody on the talk shows.  I always listen to it after the game just so my kids will get pissed at me.  They get so mad. ‘Why are you doing that dad?’  ‘I don’t know I just want to hear someone dumber than me.’"

Funny??? Yes.  But does he love you??? Now that's the question "Mr. Marshall"... That's the question.

Another user-created commentary provided by a BTB reader.

Log In Sign Up

Log In Sign Up

Please choose a new SB Nation username and password

As part of the new SB Nation launch, prior users will need to choose a permanent username, along with a new password.

Your username will be used to login to SB Nation going forward.

I already have a Vox Media account!

Verify Vox Media account

Please login to your Vox Media account. This account will be linked to your previously existing Eater account.

Please choose a new SB Nation username and password

As part of the new SB Nation launch, prior MT authors will need to choose a new username and password.

Your username will be used to login to SB Nation going forward.

Forgot password?

We'll email you a reset link.

If you signed up using a 3rd party account like Facebook or Twitter, please login with it instead.

Forgot password?

Try another email?

Almost done,

By becoming a registered user, you are also agreeing to our Terms and confirming that you have read our Privacy Policy.

Join Blogging The Boys

You must be a member of Blogging The Boys to participate.

We have our own Community Guidelines at Blogging The Boys. You should read them.

Join Blogging The Boys

You must be a member of Blogging The Boys to participate.

We have our own Community Guidelines at Blogging The Boys. You should read them.




Choose an available username to complete sign up.

In order to provide our users with a better overall experience, we ask for more information from Facebook when using it to login so that we can learn more about our audience and provide you with the best possible experience. We do not store specific user data and the sharing of it is not required to login with Facebook.