Nightmare on Legends Way

If you’re here looking for words of encouragement or a glass of Kool Aid to help you through last night’s stomach turning loss, then please move on. There’s nothing to see here. You know where to find that type of bull. There is a cadre of writers and bloggers who live to feed you pipe dreams, "it’s too soon to worry" memes, and silver lining smoke up your rear. This post is going to get real and take a ruthlessly honest inventory of what this team is.

For a modern day P.T. Barnum and egomaniac like Jerry Jones, a Monday night home game in the Jones Pantheon is the ultimate stage. So many were surprised that the team Jones owns and runs from "socks to jocks" stepped onstage with the bright lights and national audience, pulled down their jersey bottoms and evacuated right there on the Cowboys star. We haven’t seen such a disturbing scene since that infamous Sopranos episode when Vito Spatafore’s son left a present on the locker room shower floor. What we witnessed last night was just that disgusting.

If you were offended by what you witnessed last night you have every right to expect more from our Dallas Cowboys. But if you were surprised by what happened in a home game that represented a defining crossroads for the season then you just don’t know this team very well or you’re living in complete denial.

This entire organization is sick, very sick. The Cowboys organization has been dying a slow death for more than a decade. If you are just now recognizing how ill this organization is there is still time to get help. But the first and most important step is recognizing and admitting that there is a problem over which you have no control. It’s time we all admit this organization has a life threatening illness that is destroying this team from the inside. That problem is the one constant among the past 16 years of failure and heartbreak. His name is Jerral Wayne Jones.

No other owner in the NFL is more involved in the day to day operations of their team than Jerry Jones. He selects the coaches and the players. He is the surgically reconstructed face of the team. Many writers and posters on this site would have you believe the organization is now being run by Stephen Jones and Jason Garrett. If that is the case then I have two questions for you. Who allowed that transition of authority to take place and how is this new hypothetical organizational structure working out for your team? The horror film you witnessed last night was written, directed, and produced by Jerral Wayne Jones.

Let’s take a look at the slasher flick known as your Dallas Cowboys after completing the first quarter of the 2012 season.

Last in the league with 8 offensive interceptions
2nd to last in the league with 1 defensive interception
2nd to last in the league in turnover margin at -7
2nd to last in the league in scoring at 16.2 points per game
2nd to last in the league in rushing touchdowns with 1
2nd to last in the league with 33 penalties
2nd in the league with 27 negative plays (prior to last night’s game)
30th in the league in rushing with 67.8 yards per game

The Cowboys offense is a grease fire and Jerry Jones’ coach, quarterback, offensive line, and brainless star wide receiver are all playing starring roles in this nightmare script.

Let ‘s start this autopsy by looking at Jones hand-picked coach. For those of you have championed the hiring of Jason Garrett and the culture of discipline, accountability, and focus he has allegedly ushered into Valley Ranch I have one thing to say to you. Are you freaking kidding me? I don’t blame Garrett; he is who is…a robotic, passionless Cyborg who has a middling track record as an offensive play caller and a growing exhibit of epic beat downs and meltdowns as a head coach(see the Lions game 2011, Cardinals game 2011, 2ndEagles game 2011, both Giants game of 2011 season, Seahawks game 2012, and Bears game 2012). The only thing that matters are on the field results; and if you think Garrett is getting this team to play with discipline, focus, and precise execution then you’re a delusional fan.

Now let’s look at Jones’ franchise quarterback. Cowboys fans suffered through what felt like decades of disappointment as the door to door panty salesman from Arkansas tried to peddle the likes of Quincy Carter, Anthony Wright, Ryan Leaf, Clint Stoerner, Chad Hutchinson, Vinny Testeverde, Drew Henson, and Drew Bledsoe.

If you are among the brain-dead factions that routinely carries Jerry Jones water on this site, take a moment and let that list of disasters sink into your brain. Jones lack of organizational leadership has deep roots. Jones failure to plan for the departure of Troy Aikman led to 6 wasted years before an undrafted player from Eastern Illinois lifted our dreams of returning to the Promised Land.

Romo was like a magic elixir that made it too easy for Cowboys fans forget about the dark years following Aikman’s retirement. But the next years…the Romo years…have offered empty hope and dashed dreams.

Let’s talk openly and factually about just who Tony Romo is. He is a statistical magician with out of this world athletic ability who has failed to consistently lead his teams to victory when playing against average to above average NFL teams. Historically, Romo has a 41% winning percentage when playing against teams who would go on to win 8 or more games in an NFL season. Stop for a moment and let that sink in. Tony Romo has won less than half of the games he has played against average to above average teams.

Romo vs teams with 12+ wins: 5-4
Romo vs teams with 9-11 wins: 7-12
Romo vs teams with 8 wins: 6-10
Romo vs teams with 5-7 wins: 17-4
Romo vs teams with 1-4 wins: 13-1

If your immediate mental response to processing the truth about Romo’s career is to respond that Romo is part of a team and that the Cowboys win and lose collectively as a team, then you’re heading right where I want you to go. Who assembled the teams that have taken one of the most statistically prolific quarterbacks in NFL history and delivered a singular playoff win in his 6 years as a starter? Jerry bleeping Jones…that’s who! Even with a franchise quarterback as the foundation Jerry Jones has constructed teams that can do no better than winning 41% of the games they’ve played against .500 or better teams. The question about whether or not Romo can’t win big games is hard to quantify. What is easy to quantify is the fact that Jerry Jones has surrounded a well above average quarterback with mediocre talent resulting in a product that losses more games than it wins when playing average to above average teams.

4 games into the 2012 season the latest version of Jerry Jones’ Cowboys look eerily similar to recent teams. The team is loaded with offensive skill players but can’t run the ball, protect the quarterback, or score points. Does this problem sound familiar? Last year’s disappointing season was not just about a porous secondary. Jerry Jones admitted that the offensive line was big problem. His solution to the problem was to commit zero draft picks and bring in a castoff in Nate Livings and a matador named MacKenzy Bernadeau. For all you writers and fans who went on and on praising Jones' over how successful Dallas’ was during the offseason at addressing personnel problems via free agency and the draft please take your fist and punch yourself in the face for me. You had no idea what you were writing about.

If the NFL was about selling panties and pizzas the Cowboys would be champions. But it doesn’t matter how much your team is worth or how much crap your team sells. What matters is winning. And with the hallowed tradition of the glorious Dallas Cowboys winning isn’t enough. Winning Championships is the only metric that matters. So if you’re not ready to admit and accept that Jerry Jones has Killed Our Cowboys then slip on a pair of pink panties with a star on your crotch, pop open a Miller Light, order yourself a Papa Johns pizza, and sit back and enjoy the horror film known as the Cowboys 2012 season; it’s just getting started.

Another user-created commentary provided by a BTB reader.

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