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On the Cowboys' Media: Fire the Bum!

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I'm scanning the breathless and presumptuous headlines from the Metroplexians today and I'm chuckling:

"Improved Pass Rush Could Save Wade Phillips' Job

"Tony Romo Now Only Hope for Not-So-Super Cowboys"

"Dallas Cowboys Nation Has Got Love for Bill Cowher"

Step back from the emotional churn of Redskins week, for just a minute if you can, and consider the dominant story lines in Dallas the past several years:

  • 2002 -- Dave Campo has this team in a ditch. Fire him!
  • 2003 -- Jerry Hires Bill.  How long until the marriage goes sour and Bill is fired?
  • 2004 -- Bill goes 6-10.  How long before Jerry fires him?
  • 2005 -- Bill hasn't made the playoffs yet.  Should Jerry fire him?!
  • 2006 -- T.O. is here.  How long before Bill fires him or Jerry fires Bill?
  • 2007 -- Wade is here, but so is Jason Garrett.  Will Jerry fire Wade after one season, even if he wins a Super Bowl?
  • 2008 -- Wade is gonna get fired after this year, even if he wins a Super Bowl!  What?  Wade isn't winning the Super Bowl?  Fire him!

(Okay, they got 2002 right.  But a .143 batting average is nothing to brag about.)

Keeping up with all this nuance and originality makes my head hurt.  When has Jerry ever shown a quick hook?  He axed Chan Gailey after two playoff years, but that was to keep Troy Aikman from tuning him out completely.  Jerry gave Barry Switzer a longer tenure than anybody expected.  He gave Dave Campo three full seasons.  He's quirky, maybe even crazy, but he's not Al Davis Crazy.  That's a category deserving its own copyright. 

The Cowboys have never fired a head coach mid-season in 49 years.  Jerry is in year 20 and he's never done this.  The meme that "Wade Phillips might save his job for another week or two" is an insult to any serious fan's intelligence.  It just ain't gonna happen.

And if Jerry were to hire Cowher, next year or at some other future date, I'm going to go out on a long, thin limb and predict this will be the story line:

2009 -- Jerry hires another Big Bill.  How long until the marriage goes sour and Bill is fired?

Tom Coughlin once ripped the press, saying they write about football as if it were a soap opera because they understand soap operas better than football.

I think he was onto something.